About the book
Lily hasn’t always had it easy, but that’s never stopped her from working hard for the life she wants. She’s come a long way from the small town where she grew up—she graduated from college, moved to Boston, and started her own business. And when she feels a spark with a gorgeous neurosurgeon named Ryle Kincaid, everything in Lily’s life seems too good to be true.
Ryle is assertive, stubborn, maybe even a little arrogant. He’s also sensitive, brilliant, and has a total soft spot for Lily. And the way he looks in scrubs certainly doesn’t hurt. Lily can’t get him out of her head. But Ryle’s complete aversion to relationships is disturbing. Even as Lily finds herself becoming the exception to his “no dating” rule, she can’t help but wonder what made him that way in the first place.
As questions about her new relationship overwhelm her, so do thoughts of Atlas Corrigan—her first love and a link to the past she left behind. He was her kindred spirit, her protector. When Atlas suddenly reappears, everything Lily has built with Ryle is threatened.
Review (spoilers!)
I remember seeing a lot of hype online for this book, so I had pretty high expectations for it. However, I found it to be….kind of disappointing. More than just being disappointing, I actually found it to be a bit problematic in some ways, too.
I will say, it is a nice easy read if you’re looking for something non-committal that doesn’t take a lot of mental energy to get through. It was very easy to pick up after a day or two away from it, and the story line was very easy to follow.
That being said, I also found it to be a bit juvenile in terms of the writing style. It felt more like I was reading a YA novel in the sense that some parts felt a bit too fantastical and just too conveniently perfect. The aspect of Marshall making six million dollars in a year while seeming to have such a low-commitment job so that he’s constantly available to be around, and him and Alyssa just having this perfect, easy, rich life with no consequences seemed a bit ‘too good to be true’ to me. I understand that it’s just a story and not everything has to be incredibly realistic, but it felt a bit lazy in a sense. Like there wasn’t any effort to really build these side characters or give them any real personality. They just have this perfect life where nothing goes wrong, and they’re always available whenever the main character requires them to be. But I realize that’s probably just me being a bit picky.
Another part that I found to be a bit juvenile was when they decided to get married on a whim. They’d only been dating for six months and had never previously discussed marriage, but suddenly when someone brings it up as a future possibility, they’re both fully on-board and ready to make the commitment? As a 14 year old, I would have found that to be romantic – they’re in love, nothing can stand in their way! As a 27 year old, I find that to be worrisome. Especially when the author seemingly tries to make it appear like a more reasonable decision by having them discuss potential relationship dealbreakers on their way to elope. Again, younger me would have found this to simply be a whirlwind romance. Present-day me just thought it was incredibly impractical and immature to be having this discussion on the plane to Vegas. Especially considering that by this point in the book, their relationship didn’t seem to be built on any real substance. The story didn’t really give a close inside look into the actual relationship or provide any moments that showed them bonding and growing deeper feelings for one another. It seemed like they were together based purely on physical attraction, and at that point it felt like two almost-strangers deciding to get married.
When Atlas is 18, and asks 15 year old Lily when she turns 16…that creeped me out, big time. It felt incredibly predatory, and it felt obvious that he was basically asking when she would be the age of consent. After that scene, I couldn’t view Atlas as being a good guy anymore. And then he shows up at her house the night of her sixteenth birthday? If he hadn’t asked that question previously, or if she had been turning 17, maybe it could have been perceived as him just wanting to wish her a happy birthday. But the fact that he had asked that question, and the fact that they had sex that night, makes it seem like he was eagerly waiting for her to turn 16 so that he could act on his feelings without it being a legal issue, as if it suddenly isn’t creepy and predatory the moment she goes from 15 to 16. That part really bothered me, and was so unnecessary – it could have been so easily avoided! They could have been the same age! They could have just not had sex or any kind of intimate relationship! Why make this choice.
Now, let’s talk about what this novel was really about: an abusive relationship. I think it would be easy to say, “I don’t like that she forgave him after he hit her,” but I also feel that would be an unfair statement. I understand that abusive relationships are very complicated, and it’s not always so easy to leave. That being said, I didn’t like how quickly Alyssa brushed past the fact that her brother beat up Lily just because Lily was pregnant. It was almost like a quick, “oh no, that’s so sad, you should leave him even though he’s my brother. But yay you’re pregnant, let’s celebrate!” and then she went straight into sharing her maternity clothes and wanting to plan a baby shower. It seemed very inconsiderate of how Lily might be feeling, and how difficult of a decision she had ahead of her, especially with pregnancy being a factor, too. I think that scene could have been so powerful if Alyssa had acted as more of a support system for Lily in that moment, and had spent more time checking in on how she’s feeling and offering resources to her. Maybe instead of wanting to plan a big baby shower, she could have offered to help provide Lily with access to counselling resources, for example. Maybe she could have asked Lily how she feels about the pregnancy, as I’m sure finding out you’re pregnant with your abuser’s baby would bring about all kinds of extra mixed emotions that wouldn’t normally come up in an unplanned pregnancy within a healthy relationship. I just think that scene had so much potential to be powerful, and show how women can support each other through such difficult, sensitive times. Instead, it became a very shallow moment for Alyssa to flex her vast wealth.
In the end, I am glad that Lily decided to leave Ryle. I was a little bit worried that Colleen Hoover would try to spin the story to give Ryle some kind of redemption arc where maybe he makes some big romantic gesture, and that’s enough for Lily to forgive him and for them to live happily ever after. And I know that in reality, a lot of women are unable to leave their abusive relationships for multiple reasons. And maybe in some cases, the abuser is able to change for good, and they’re able to work things out. However, I’m glad she made the decision to have Lily leave Ryle, because I think it creates a very empowering ending to the story, and shows that it is possible to leave an abusive relationship.
I also really liked a quote from page 274, where she says,
People spend so much time wondering why the women don’t leave. Where are all the people who wonder why the men are even abusive? Isn’t that where the only blame should be placed?
I’m so glad she made this point, because I think it is an issue that needs to be addressed. So many people put all the responsibility on the abused individual to fix the situation by leaving, rather than looking at the abuser and wondering why they don’t also work on themselves to not be abusive. It’s like we just accept that the abuser is going to be violent, that’s just the way they are, and it’s up to the abused individual to make the decision that puts an end to the violence. But even if the abused individual walks away, that’s not really putting an end to the violence, is it? Maybe it saves them from the violence, but the abuser won’t stop. They’ll just continue the cycle with someone else. We need to stop asking women they they aren’t leaving, and we need to start asking their abusive partners why they’re acting this way in the first place.
Overall, I did like the concept of the story. I liked that she discusses how complicated it can be to be in an abusive relationship, and how difficult it can be to leave the person who abuses you when you already have such strong, deep feelings of love for them. I don’t have first-hand experience, but I’m sure abusive relationships never start out abusive. I’m sure it doesn’t start out with the abusive partner hitting their significant other on the second or third date. These relationships start out just like any other relationship, with a lot of care and affection, and then the abuse comes later, after there are already strong feelings involved, making it so much more complicated.
I think the topic of abuse is very delicate, and is a difficult thing to write about. I appreciate how painful this must have been for Colleen Hoover to write, as well, considering she was writing from the experience of seeing her mother go through this with her father. However, I do wish she had handled some of it a bit differently, and maybe dove in a bit deeper into the sensitive parts rather than brushing past it to make the story lighter and easier. Maybe that wasn’t her intention, but it definitely felt that way to me as a reader. Sometimes, when we’re dealing with a difficult topic, it’s okay to make the story painful. Because the reality of it is painful, and making light of it just doesn’t do it justice.
But, those are just my thoughts.
Until next time,
Nadine
nadinesnarratives.art.blog 